Monday, December 8, 2008

Today I became a true Jet fan

Grinch steals Jet fan hope.

The Jets lead the division but this is how I feel about our season.




Full disclosure: I didn't even see the game. I have NFL gamepass and with the top shelf option that means access to all games. I originally thought that I'd watch every Jet game this season but being on the euro side of the Atlantic means a 4 oclock game in the states starts at 10pm for me.

This didn't seem like much of an impediment in theory but I foolishly overlooked the fact that I'm an old man with a three month old infant and a nine year old (plus some kids from my ex's life before me) So being sleep deprived and having to wake up early every day and deal with infant, sleep deprived partner, getting kids ready for school etc the whole idea of staying up till 1am on a Sunday evening just didn't survive the first encounter with reality.
Even my strong desire to see all this seasons games could not exceed my desire for the sweet release and refuge of the scant sleep available. And so each week I pray the Jets have a 1 oclock game or I have to make plans to watch the archived version the following day.... if I haven't seen the score or if I have and it's a game I still want to watch.

It was with a heavy heart that I hit the hay last night as I really really wanted to see the Jets redeem themselves after last weeks Bronco loss. Last weeks loss was easily written of as par for the course for Gang Green. I mean, it wouldn't be the Jets without the requisite inappropriate loss at regular intervals and since the Pats also lost we were still in first place yadda yadda yadda.
I figured it was a well timed wake up call to prevent cockiness seeping in, to keep us sharp for our turn at a cinderella march to the Super Bowl. Then I woke up this morning, clicked my browser on which of course has the NFL.com set as home page and saw that the Niners had beaten us.


My first reaction was "Well, I guess two weeks ago when an all NY Super Bowl was the topic dujour, was the high point of the season"

This sounds rational enough no? It sounds like a normal innocuous response right? Wrong! Suddenly I had a blinding flash of realization that the Jet lifer body snatchers had finally gotten to me. Just like that I'd given up on the season. Without preplanning or forethought, I'd reached the conclusion that the appearance of great things to come would be as good as it would get. There was the towel flying through the air in slow motion, on its way to the canvas in the middle of the ring way before my fighter even had a chance to struggle to his feet. For ten year now I'd resisted adopting the bone-deep bitter stance and attitude of most of my fellow Jet fans friends who were lifers and seemed to crumble into a sobbing heap of wailing flailing flesh at the first sign of trouble in any given season. Indeed, on any given Sunday, like dogs that have been beat to much they would seem to "spend half their lives just a-coverin' up"

But there I was. An objective look at the standings would show that due to our in division record we are in fact still in first place in the division. Repeat: Jets in first place in the AFC east in Week 14. True, its a three way tie in an excitingly tight division race in which we own the tie breakers right now but there I was, slime still dripping off me from the pod, deciding that the season would be all downhill from here.
I wasn't wailing flailing or sobbing yet but I'd let my mind make that Jet fan suicidal lemming-leap nonetheless. I desperately thought about sliding back into the body snatchers pod and trying to psychic-ly reverse the process through sheer force of will. This couldn't really be happening! I could just picture my bitter Jet bretheren looking at me with that blank stare and saying in that monotone "Now you are one of us. Come on lets watch the game" I would be led to a spot on the couch and much like a passenger on a doomed Jet, would spend the rest of my football watching days raising my seatback, slapping my tray table up and leaning forward into that crash position at the first penalty or turnover for the rest of my days.

I didn't want it to end like this. I really didn't. I never thought they'd get me. I wasn't one of them. I was a modern era Jet fan you understand. I only came onboard when Parcells took over the controls in 98. I didn't come with that baggage of 30 years of heartbreak after the franchises one brief shining moment. It couldn't happen to me.
And still it did. I stood there like the Grinch watching the Who's celebrate down in Whoville without their pantoozlers and wuffles... puzzling and puzzling till my puzzler was sore.
Oh well... I never thought I'd be old enough to pull my elsatic waist band up to mid spare tire either.

On the bright side if we do make a Fairy Tale march through January, I will celebrate with my Jet fan friends not as a newcomer or an outsider. No... for better or worse, I have become that which I have feared and looked upon with pity and contempt, I am now a true Jet fan.

Ken

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Whoever wrote the review on the ion and the revo speed is obviously retarded and hasnt ever played football in his life or he is just a wus and doesnt want to hit because if you were delivering huge hits every play like you should be you would die for a helmet like that!